Thursday, December 31, 2009

vade retro atrum pars

(Latin, “go back, Dark Side”), to repel evil or bad luck.

 

The deliverance ceremony will begin tonight at midnight and is expected to last until the early hours of the New Year. I have tried many other times to coax her out with logical thinking and compassion and now I have no choice but  to resort to drastic measures. Sometimes nonviolent communication just doesn’t work.  Most of the time she is annoying but under control. Since she has become increasingly unruly of late I have decided that serious action is necessary. 

Enough is enough. She must leave; I will no longer tolerate her.

The dark side of me, my evil twin, the Hungry Ghost, the one that is at times painfully obsequious  and driven by other’s approval, the one who wakes up in the middle of the night stressed  about changing friendships and obscure thoughts of impending doom, the one who second guesses everything and reads way too much into other peoples actions; this troublesome, tormented spirit is being violently exorcised from my body in a sacred ceremony at midnight tonight.  With her will go the feelings of powerlessness, relatively  innocuous addictions and victimhood and all traces of my mother.  I believe DS is also responsible for most of the disorder and clutter around my house, but I can’t be sure. Time will tell on that one. I will miss the excuse she gave me for not reaching my true potential  but this thought too should be gone by tomorrow morning. 

The need for an exorcism is nothing to be ashamed of. It can happen to the best of us. To quote Wikipedia:

“Mother Teresa allegedly underwent an exorcism late in life under the direction of the Archbishop of Calcutta, Henry D'Souza, after he noticed she seemed to be extremely agitated in her sleep and feared she "might be under the attack of the evil one."[35] 

I look forward to a long and restful sleep.

A home puja will be set up to ensure that DS (Dark Side) will not be able to return.  DS  is already wild and frantic and suspecting the worse so I would not recommend any visitations at this heightened emotional time.

Already prepared and collected for tonight’s event are the Atharva Veda, containing the secrets related to magic and medicine,the Bhagavata Purana, a large collection of mantras from various traditions along with amulets and talismans, sage and other cleansing herbs, the Zen  Daibutchô-ju  spell, holy water, incense and blowing conches used in puja and the  Garuda Purana just in case although I highly doubt it will be necessary and of course all Catholic exorcism necessities near and dear to my heart including, the document Of Exorcisms and Certain Supplications.  Mix it all together with a strong will to change and I hope it will be a New Year to remember.

By Friday I should be lighter, visibly calmer and more centered with a possible glow about me. Without DS holding me back and taking up so much space in my mind, I can not wait to see where my creativity, my wild sense of adventure and my strong will, my compassion for myself and others will take me. 2010 will be the best year ever.

My best to all my friends. May the new year bring out your best side and may all your dreams come true.